(intro)
I'm so lost; don't know what to do
Don't know where to go, you're so far

(hook)
I'm so lost, so lost
Don't know what to do, what to do
Don't know where to go, where to go
You're so far, far away, so alone
And I know you feel the same
But don't worry, don't worry, nooo, don't worry

(verse)
Really loved me
Lookin' back, 2019 graduated, would've waited
If you stated that you really loved me
From the point of growth to maturity
Understanding what it really was, yeah
To what it really was... young in love, never comprehended
But you said it, contemplated if you really meant it
Tellin' me that you love me
Three strong words that I'll never forget
Well, I thought you "really" loved me
Yeah, let's fast forward; it's 2024
Graduated college, bachelor's degree, wild to see
How I found myself when I was lost
When I was low, you'd up and go
You would never show; how would I know?
Of where to go, you were all I had
I'm not even mad, it's just sad
You taught me many things
Came in this world alone, so I gotta do it alone
No one's gonna really be by your side in the end
It's more of a fight for yourself, a self-reflection
It's who you wanna be, so search for that opportunity

(bridge)
So alone, I'm so lost, so alone
I'm so lost; don't know what to do
Don't know where to go
You're so far

(verse)
Uh, Rewind back to the time
When the original "I'm So Lost" came out in 2020
When it was about love, thinking we could fix something that we lost
Tellin' you not to worry, no, not to worry, mmm
But within' that time we
Disconnected and we
Neglected the fact that what we had was never real
No strings were attached
Two years together was nothing but waste of time
When I could have just focused on myself
But that's what young love does
It distracts you from the things in life
Things that you wanna' pursue
It leaves you feeling blank and not knowing of what to do, aye
Mmm, it leaves you feeling blank and not knowing of what to do, mm

(outro)
I'm so lost; don't know what to do
Don't know where to go
You're so far
So lost

Last night was a long day 

When I got home, I collapsed on my bed 

And fell into a fitful sleep 

With nightmares running rapid 

Then frightened I woke up 

And saw a scary light 

Crawling from my window towards me 

Hesitant I looked slowly towards the window 

As eyes locked onto that color screaming moon 

I tried to take a breath 

But there was no room 

Only if I looked away could I somehow breathe and say 

Ah it’s a frightfully beautiful moon 

I wish it'd last 

Even though I know it must go away sometime soon

I’m beginning to think
You told me a softer version
Of what she was.

You said it wasn’t special.
That you appreciated her,
But that was all.
That you didn’t love her,
That she gave you the ick,
That you stayed because you were lonely,
Or afraid of what she might say.

But then I found your words.

And your poems
Tell a different story.

A year together.
Beautiful things said about her.
Intimate things.
Your “pajarita.”

A love that sounded
Like it was teaching you
How to love again.
A relationship that sounded
Like it meant something. 

And now I don’t know
Which version of you to believe.

Maybe you did end it
Because you knew she wasn’t the one.

Maybe your feelings for me 
Were as strong as you say,
Even while you were with her.

But I don’t think
You were as honest with me
About what she meant to you
As you could have been.

And that’s what hurts.

Not that you had a past.

Not even that you loved her.

It’s that you let me believe
there was almost nothing to mourn.

You asked me to help choose
The poems you’d read at your workshop, 
And I didn’t even know
I was helping you choose
Words you’d once written for her.

I didn’t even know,
Because you told me you never
Wrote for her. 
That you only lied and told her 
Some poems were about her
Because you never truly loved her. 

It never crossed my mind 
That I might be helping you choose 
Words that belonged to her. 

I gave you my opinion.
Told you my favorite ones,
For the world to hear. 

And somewhere,
She may have seen them
And known exactly what they were.

I feel stupid.

Then you reached out to her
For “closure,”
And I was left with only
The version of that conversation
You told me.

You thanked her
For making you a better man.
For being part of your family.
For everything you shared.

And now that I know
It was more meaningful
Than you let me believe,
I can’t help wondering
What else was said.

Because I don’t know. 

What else have I been told
Only halfway?
My mind keeps filling
The spaces you left blank. 

You made me feel
Like it had always been me.

Like what you felt for me
Was so strong. 
That everything before me,
Barely mattered.

But maybe it wasn’t that simple.

Maybe she was special.
Maybe you were actually in love with her.

I don’t know.

And that’s the part
That is breaking me,
Not knowing what was real.
Because I can accept your past.
I can accept that you loved someone
Before you loved me.
What I don’t know how to accept
Is feeling like you rewrote that past
So I could feel like
I was always the one.

And now I am left
Standing between your words
And your poems,
Trying to figure out
Which one is telling me the truth.
Trying to figure out 
Which parts of your past are finished
And which parts are still alive inside of you. 

You love me.
I believe that.

I just wish
You had trusted me enough
To tell me the truth
About what came before me. 
I would rather
Have loved you
Knowing she mattered
Than love you now
Wondering what else
You made smaller
Just so I wouldn’t be hurt.

Thanks for always being there, even at night,
When I’m sad and happy, when I’m bored and angry.
And thank you for always understanding correctly,
For your tender support, for always being on my side.

Whenever you say my name, I get butterflies,
And my heart—I hope you know that you can own it.
It’s hard to show sentiments; I should improvise,
But at the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.

They warned me of the dangers 

Of talking to those men 

But I had to have my way 

So, I dug right in 

Well now two years later  

I’ve finally ended my reign of “fun” 

And every living breathing moment 

Is a reminder of the horror that’s just begun

I'll be hugging you while we cook,
From the back the way you look.

I'll be playing with your curls,
After going through all your curves.

I'll be kissing on your forehead cause you're the only thing running in my head!

I only need your lap to take a nap.

I'll be giving cuddles
harder in your menstruals.

Every cell of yours is mine, and I want to kiss all my epithelial cells, one by one.

If time matters, ask the student who missed their favourite class.
If time matters, ask the candidate who just missed their final interview.
If time matters, ask the colleagues who are waiting for their salaries.
If time matters, ask the worker who missed the last train.
If time matters, ask the patient waiting for an ambulance and the doctors who might save their life.
If time matters, ask the shopkeeper struggling to balance supply and demand.
If time matters, ask the nurse working even during festivals, away from the celebrations everyone else enjoys.
If time matters, ask the clients struggling to convince their customers.
If time matters, ask the grandparents about the struggles they endured throughout their lives, especially in their final days.
If time matters, ask the wife waiting for her long-distance husband, hoping to treasure every moment they spend together.
If time matters, ask the writer who cannot launch the book they have spent years trying to publish.
If time matters, ask the storyteller who wonders whether their story is worth telling.
If time matters, ask the labourer about the challenges they have faced.
If time matters, ask the woman who experienced the loss of a pregnancy after carrying her baby for nine months.
If time matters, ask the person in recovery about the withdrawal they endured while staying in rehabilitation.